I swear to God, I couldn’t make up something this outrageous if I tried.  The Columbus Dispatch notes that while Congresswoman Mary Jo Kilroy was at the White House to witness the President’s signing the historic Wall Street reform bill into law that she helped to shape, her opponent, Steve Stivers, former bank lobbyist, was in D.C. hosting a fundraiser with the reform bill’s opponents:

Stivers, who has been critical of the bill, held a fundraiser in Washington this afternoon with lobbyists for the financial industry, which has opposed many of the reform measures. Suggested contributions ranged from $500 to $5,000.

Stivers had accused Kilroy of using her position on a House-Senate panel on the Wall Street reforms to solicit funds from the financial industry.

“(Stivers) did in fact shake down Wall Street today,” said Gabby Adler, spokeswoman for the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee, which backs Kilroy. “Steve Stivers literally stood with Wall Street interests at a fundraiser in Washington.”

Are you messin’ with us, Dispatch?

Stivers donors I mean, Stivers is accusing Kilroy of using the Wall Street reform bill to get money from the very opponents of the bill on the same day he’s hosting a fundraiser with the very same opponents of the bill?

How many of you pictured this guy giving Stivers a bag of money with a green $ on it as he attacked Kilroy?

Seriously, all Stivers had to do was end his statement with: “Now excuse me, but we’re off for my annual fox/peasant hunt….”

“Don’t you mean, pheasant hunt, sir?”

“No, why do you ask, Gerald?”

Here’s a protip from me to the Stivers campaign:  If you’re already saddled with the fact that your candidate used to (and I mean, fairly recently) be a bank lobbyist, don’t attack your opponent’s Wall Street reform while still wiping the shrimp cocktail sauce off over your $1,000 a plate fundraiser packed with Wall Street lobbyists.  Cause what you did today, was just ballsy stupid.

Gekko Stivers