I was planning to be in a comatose state of mourning for about a week after last night’s Lebron James decision, but then Dan Gilbert has to open his mouth.  As a candidate running to represent the region of downtown Cleveland where Gilbert’s Lebron-less businesses will sit, including his constitutionally enshrined right to run his own currency mint…er…I mean casino, I have something to say to Mr. Gilbert, who isn’t even from Cleveland.

Shut up, and go sit on a beach somewhere for about a month.  You need a vacation.  You failed to keep the best basketball player of our time in Cleveland, which means you probably need a break.  I suppose this city is just vulnerable enough at this moment to believe your self-serving, cover my ass, pander, but any Clevelander who believes this line from Gilbert’s pathetic letter really needs mental help.

“I PERSONALLY GUARANTEE THAT THE CLEVELAND CAVALIERS WILL WIN AN NBA CHAMPIONSHIP BEFORE THE SELF-TITLED FORMER ‘KING’ WINS ONE.”

ROFL.  LMAO.  ETC.  Is that what Gilbert is going to put on the slot machines in his casino downtown?  The Dan Gilbert PERSONAL GUARANTEE.  That, and a buck fifty will get you a cup of coffee, Dan.  Cleveland had its shot at multiple championships, for 7 years with Lebron James, Dan Gilbert was the owner during the majority of that period, and Dan Gilbert wants us all to believe that there is not a drop of accountability on his end.

Sounds like a guy desperately trying to keep the revolving doors spinning at his casino which isn’t even open yet, and which will be the only business he has in Cleveland making any money after he just watched Lebron James leave his other business.  Good thing the Ohio constitution enshrines Gilbert’s other business model.

The fact is, the Cavs had Lebron James before Dan Gilbert bought the team, and they lost Lebron James while Gilbert was owner.  No open letter to fans will change that.  Gilbert hired Mike Brown.  Gilbert signed all the checks.  And in the end, none of it meant Lebron stayed in Cleveland.  That will be hard to live down long term, Mr. Gilbert, notwithstanding your pathetic letter pandering to a heartbroken city in order to keep your butt afloat.

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