Tomorrow, there’s a gay pride parade through downtown Cincinnati.  If you’re self-appointed state morality czar/President of Citizens for Community Values Phil Burress, then you, of course, have to freak the hell out:

"We think its not right for them to invade the Fourth of July, and we’re trying to warn people that if they do go downtown they may be exposed to some deviant behavior," Phil Burress, president of Citizens for Community Values. "Everything from sex in the streets to topless women."

Phil Burress began his morality crusade after grappling with his own porn addiction (no joke), and like some addicts, he believes that nobody else is safe unless they live the same t-totaller live he lives.  Apparently, he hears “gay pride parade,” and he starts to instantly think “bow chicha bow wow” and topless lesbians having sex in the streets… on the Fourth of July.  In other news, I love freedom.

Before you get your assless leather metal studded chaps (and nothing us on) and release the Gimp, you should know that it’s, well, not quite what Burress thinks it is.  I know, stunning, isn’t it?

I just think it shows he’s out of touch," said parade chairman George Crawford. "Ninety-five percent of our parade entries are church organizations, student and university groups, political rights groups."

A Cincinnati police spokeswoman said that neither the District 5 commander nor the officer in charge of special events recalled any criminal complaints or arrests at any of the Gay Pride parades.

Crawford added naysayers won’t rain on his parade.

"They never want to focus on the reality of the GLBT community and the couples who have been together for 10, 15, 20 years," Crawford said. "I know couples who have been together for 42 years and go to church every Sunday and give their time to charity and work for the rights of the oppressed and have very strong family values."

Of course, Burress is calling on all Cincinnatians to flee downtown Cincinnati this weekend, which is telling how much things have changed in twenty years in Cincinnati.  Twenty years ago, it was the gay rights groups that was leading a boycott of the city over Burress’ success in getting a provision added to the city charter that prohibited the city from barring discrimination based on sexual orientation.

Now, that provision has been repealed, and Burress’ political influence is growing weaker with every year.  His most recent successes were the gay marriage amendment in 2004, and getting the state legislature to pass more restrictions on strip clubs.  But as a political force, he knows his influence, even within the Republican Party, is shrinking.

 
  • I think PB is starting to change you, Modern.

    “bow chicha bow wow”?

    Fucking classic!

  • mvirenicus

    lebron's income is obscene.

  • There is nothing with being gay but being cause of influence relating to pornography is another. Yes there is such thing as freedom but still it's not always absolute.

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