Recently the State of Ohio setup a website that allows Ohio’s residents to suggest projects that should be funded by federal stimulus dollars.

A list of over 8000 suggestions received on the site has recently been posted for everyone to review. I haven’t worked my way through the whole list yet, but I have found some pretty interesting stuff in the ones I have reviewed.

A big chunk of the submissions deal with local problems – roads, sewers, etc. Over 80 suggested projects relate specifically to “sludge”. Yuck.

There are also a lot of projects submitted by people who want to start a small business or need help with their existing business.

One guy wants money to build a barn to “house twenty-four bulls who have been approved for semen export to the European Union.” Another guy wants 250K to open an Italian restaurant in Meigs County.

Funding for most of these projects seems pretty unlikely.

But not as unlikely as for the guy (Dennis Gamble from PCC Internet Group) who wants money to help the government weed out the America-hating, millionaire “Moslems” in Dayton who are stealing our tax dollars by getting foodstamps. According to Dennis, these people are “applying for assistance and getting it from the state and federal government and they have millions of dollars in their bank accounts.” Even worse, “a lot of these people in Dayton Ohio are Moslems, they hate the United States and feels this is how they are winning the war against us.”

jones200Speaking of xenophobic asshats, Butler County Sheriff Richard Jones has requested hundreds of thousands of dollars for a helicopter to capture illegal immigrants and a “maxi bus” for transporting them.

And just when I’m about ready to give up on Ohioans and their stupid, racist, immigrant-hating project ideas I get to the absolute best idea I’ve read so far.

This one comes from a guy in Clinton Country who submitted a project titled ‘Professional wrestling Shows’. It goes a little something like this:

To train and display talent of professional wrestlers who have been trained by Ultimate Impact Wrestling trainers. These trainees would be from economically challenged backgrounds and those who have had some criminal backgrounds. By training them we would be rechanneling their lives into an area where they could ultilize physical and mental skills in a positive manner and be recognized for their efforts by ?working in front of a live crowd. We would each them the necessary skills of partcular holds, wrestling persona, microphone communication. We would need to obtain a building for training and shows as we have currently been using my garage for training and this unheated. We have been successful in training some with troubled backgrounds previously. We also will assist with bookings after training has been completed. ?This would definitely offer an alternative for younger people, male and female, as an alternative to criminal or mschevious activities. We would be available to anyone outside of Clinton County, Ohio. All persons seeking training must be 18 years of age or older or a parent or legal guardian must sign for them.

 
  • Anthony

    Thank God there weren’t any crazy requests for volcano monitoring to save lives.

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