Availability is one of the biggest hurdles to becoming an addict. You want to know why so many people are nicotine addicts? Availability is the answer. Cigarettes are available everywhere, 24 hours a day. So addiction is easy and relatively cheap.

Not so much with something like OxyContin, which is a highly controlled, Schedule II narcotic. It might be easy to get your hands on a few pills from your friend after his appendectomy, but if you really want to be an addict you need a stable supply of the stuff.

So when I first read about Track Palin’s OxyContin addiction I was a bit skeptical.

It seemed kind of a stretch to believe that a 17 year old kid, regardless of his family’s political connections, could get his hands on a steady stream of hardcore prescription pain killers.

It turns out it was easier than I expected.

Enter Levi Johnston (and his drug dealing mother).

It looks like Levi Johnston was more than just the local high school hockey star and the father of Bristol (Track’s sister) Palin’s unborn child.

It looks like Levi was the kid you wanted to know if you needed a solid and reliable OxyContin connection at Wasilla High School. I wonder how many of the other kids knew that his awesome connection was actually his own mother?

I guess Wasilla really is one of those real, honest, pro-America small towns that Sarah Palin was talking about.

And I guess these are some of those real Americans. The good and decent folk who love their kids and their country. The Joe-sixpacks and the hockey moms who make this country great (by using their hockey-star sons to sell illegal drugs to the local politician’s kids.)

And here I was thinking the Palins were nothing more than a bunch of oddly named, drug snorting, teen-sex-having, hypocritical Alaskan hillbillies.

  • Leave them alone Joseph. You got your damned black President now just STFU and let these decent pro-Americans live their drug addled lives. You are such a h8er!

  • I’m starting to heart the Palins. They managed to smash a presidency’s worth of scandals and stupidity into about a month and a half.

  • oldboldcold

    paLInsARah-you can’t spell LIAR without it. How is it possible she has no comment on the Oxy bust, especially since Track and Bristol are tied into it. She usually can’t shut up. More pallin around with the millionaire Palins.

  • Zamboni

    Well there’s the baby’s name. Oxycodone.

  • the Palins came on to the national stage with most of that baggage already in tow – thought the full weight of it was still hidden from public view.

    The trooper gate thing was already in full swing when they announced her as the running mate, but I think we (non-traditional media) all deserve some credit for pushing and pulling the rest of that stuff free.

    Not sure why it wasn’t made public earlier, though.

    I can only assume that people in Alaska have much more important things to worry about than pregnant teens and meth-dealing moms.

    You know…. things like keeping warm and protecting themselves from polar bears.

  • J-Dog

    …and Russians!

  • Moose Patty Palin

    Palin & 1st dude were caught in lies previously & the rest came tumbling down like a house of cards. Palin’s $150k shopping trip for herself & family was covered over like moose patties. Then the report came out that after the uproar, she continued to buy more clothes. Now a report is about a new illegitimate baby named Tripp after the future mom-in-law

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