Republican Strategist John Feehery just published a post titled “Year Two of President Obama” over at The Hill’s Pundits blog.
In it he predicts that the world will collapse if Barack Obama becomes president. His story goes something like this:
1. Obama pulls all American troops and embassy personnel from Iraq and Iran, Turkey and Saudi Arabia all immediately invade Iraq.
2. The Saudis cut oil production and gas prices go up.
3. Russia helps Iran and Korea build nuclear power plants.
4. The Chinese government imposes its will on the people of Taiwan.
Ooh! Scary stuff. It really would be horrific if all of that stuff happened!
oh wait a minute. It already did…
Unrest in the middle east?
Look at this guy! He’s the Amazing fucking Kreskin over here. Fighting in the middle east? How did you ever predict that? The middle east has been in constant turmoil for thousands of years, dude. Bombing the shit out the country only made it worse.
High Oil and Gas Prices?
With the help of the Bush/Cheney energy policy we already HAVE record high gasoline prices and oil is selling for over $100 a barrel. Another great prediction!
Russian assistance with nuclear power?
Iran has been trying to build a nuclear power plant since the late 70’s initially with the help of the Germans. In 1995 Russia signed a contract to help Iran finish the plant in Bushehr. 13 years later, the plant is still not running.
China forcing its will on the people of Taiwan?
On October 25, 1945, Republic of China troops defeated Japanese troops in Taiwan. Shortly after, China set up a military administration to manage Taiwan. They seized property, set up government monopolies of many industries, imposed martial law and one-party rule. This lasted for almost 40 years!
How about this for a more realistic prediction…
1. President John McCain moves more US Troops into Iraq
2. The US borrows more money from China to pay for the war
3. Walmart grows even bigger – eventually employing 75% of US citizens
4. China invades Tibet
5. President McCain protests the invasion
6. China stops loaning us money and stops all shipments of plastic crap to the US
7. Without money to fund the war, all troops are immediate brought home (not on our terms) and all funding to Iraq is cut off
7. Without any products to sell, all Walmart stores close – effectively shutting down the US economy
Now THAT is scary.